DISCLAIMER: Please check the tags associated with this post and see if there is anything that might cause problems with your own beliefs, or anything that might offend you in any way.
This post may have some topics that some of my readers may find offensive. I understand that I may lose some readers, or that perhaps I may be flooded with questions. I understand that I am stepping into a taboo area of spirituality, and that it may raise some problems for me in the future. I was guided to write this post, it was a subtle request from Him, the Being I have tried so hard to outrun my entire life but I keep coming back to… Read on at your own discretion, and if you choose to continue, try to keep an open mind. This is only the first part of this series of posts, and it sort of explains the gist of the series. The next post will be my interactions with him throughout my life, up until this point. I hate disappointing people, I hate offending them, but I am tired of not exploring my spirituality in its entirety.
I am not a believer in Hell-fire and damnation. Obviously. However, I believe that there is great significance for many people, including myself, in the tale of Heaven and the fall of Lucifer. It is very much so engrained in our society, the concept of Sin and Redemption, of being saved, of falling from grace. It is something that, even though we may not believe in any more, we are faced with daily – we may feel as if we are going to Hell, or perhaps that we have somehow lost grace with God. I was not raised in a Christian home – my parents were both very open minded, and my mother has been a practicing witch for much of her life. I chose to go to church, I chose to believe in God. With those choices, I also chose to believe in Him… Lucifer.
There is no denying my obsession with darkness, with evil – I write about it all the time. But I have never seen Lucifer/Satan/The Devil as anything but a being that embodies truth and wisdom. I never bought the whole Ultimate Evil thing – it never felt like the right title. It always felt like He had been wrongly accused, like perhaps there was some sort of hidden agenda behind His fall. I don’t know.
I just wanted to talk with you about my perception of Lucifer, or as He has introduced Himself to me – Memnoch. I know that a lot of people, including those that may read this and know me IRL, may balk at the idea because they believe that He is evil. I want to apologize to those people, those friends, and try my hardest to explain to them my relationship with Him.
Memnoch is not the biblical Devil – he is much different. Though He does enjoy the unconventional, the taboo, and the sinful, He also enjoys literature, intelligence, debate, and honesty. Sometimes, brutal honesty. He is able to change His appearance, as any Deity is capable of – but He chooses to don the appearance that best suits the frame of mind of His intended. I guess Memnoch could be considered a UPG experience, mostly because He does not appear to have many, if any at all, characteristics of the biblical Devil. Or perhaps He is the truth behind the lies – we all know that the victors write the books, and that those victors often embellish or lie about events. Who knows the truth? – I sure don’t.
I have been reading a lot about Luciferians and their beliefs, as well as some people who have had/are having personal experiences with Lucifer. Though I believe in all Deities – that includes the Christian God, as well as the Devil – I have struggled with the inclusion of the Christian pantheon into my work. Yes, I have requested Jesus to be present during certain workings because he is a wonderful guide – and yes, I “take the Lord’s name in vain”. I do not, nor have I in many years, consider myself a Christian – I am not a Christian Witch, nor will I ever be.
I dunno where I was going with this…
I guess, in short, I wanted to say:
I have a personal relationship with Memnoch, more commonly known as Lucifer. And it is starting to become easier to accept my relationship with Him as I grow in my path.