Tori’s Temple – A New Category

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I have decided to give Christopher Penczak’s Temple of Witchcraft series another go, and will be using this blog as a means of keeping track of my progression. I, of course, will have a private journal for recording things, and the posts here in this new category will be edited to leave out the more personal things that need to be kept hidden.

I am definitely looking forward to this study, and hope that I have the drive to get through it, as I have attempted in the past but life usually gets in the way. Fingers crossed. I have a tough time keeping commitments and it has caused some problems in my life.

I think it is an apt time to begin a new journey, seeing as Samhain is this coming weekend, and it is viewed as the New Year for witches. New beginnings, so fun.

I will be doing my first post sometime this week, unsure when… Again I say that I have a serious problem with commitment, and often forget that I planned on doing or writing something. I have to find a way to keep myself on track and remind myself that my spiritual path is a serious investment and I need to be serious about this. *sighs* I have dreams, you know? I am so tired of slacking. Lol.

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Altered States

Ealier this morning, around 12:30AM, I walked into our bedroom and undressed, turned YouTube on to a video of Shamanic Drumming, and climbed under the blankets. I closed my eyes and began paying close attention to my breath, willing myself into a light meditative state. I listened to the drumbeats, and felt the pounding in my soul.

As I slipped into trance, I felt a soft, cool breath on the right side of face, as if someone were breathing on me. I slipped into the void and fell into a vortex, where I began to spin as if I were on the Gravitron ride at an amusement park or carnival. I felt and heard nothing from the outside world – I knew it was still there, I could sense my husband in the living room, and I knew my children were upstairs asleep, but I heard nothing. It had all faded away from my mind.

My right arm felt weighted, as if held down by something – when I felt the distinct sensation of itches begging to be scratched all over my body, I ignored them. I am sure they were still there, they never went away, but my mind glossed over them and did not recognize their existence. I began to feel as if my right arm had faded out of existence, and unfortunately this triggered my mind to come back to waking consciousness.

I shook it off, wrote down my experiences, and attempted to do another trance but ended up sitting in darkness, in the void, with nothingness my only companion, for about 30 minutes. This second trance was not a fail, but it was exactly what my mind needed to reset after the vortex episode.

This was my first step into using a drumming recording to enter a trance, and I must say that I prefer this method over the typical counting down method. This is a much smoother transition into an altered state, and it creates a different experience entirely. It makes it more difficult for me to find my Tree, at least from the first experience, but I think it will prove to be a more solid method than any other I have tried.

I Do….

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We said “I Do” on October 16th, 2015. We met November 3rd 2014. I married my best friend, my partner, my twin flame. I waited for years to finally meet him, but I never thought we would be here. He is going off to BCT for the Army in the middle of November, right before the most stressful and nerve-wracking time of year – the Holidays. I am not prepared to spend this first holiday season as a married couple apart, but I have close friends and family, and in-laws that approve of me and my children, so that should be alright.

Every morning I wake up and see his face, and know that he is mine forever. We will make it through every obstacle, over every hurdle, and through the flames that may rise around us. I am still in awe of the fact that I am married, that I have found my partner, the person I will spend my life with. We share values on key issues, and when we disagree (we may argue and fight), we communicate in the end and figure out if there needs to be a compromise. He is the world to me and my kids, and we are the world to him.

I am still freaking out and excited. The wedding wasn’t much of a ceremony, we just did it outside our apartment and my soul-sister was the officiator (she was feeding her infant while going through it). We signed the papers and we were married. We are planning on having a real ceremony and exchange of vows when he gets out of BCT and AIT, which will be around this time next year.

Things are changing for our little family, good changes and scary changes, but I see brightness in our futures.